. . . . . . . . . : : : : l i t t l e p a d : : : : . . . . . . . . . . . . . : s h a n g h a i : . . . . . .

jets to brazil (and back)

since calvin left for sa0 paulo 2 weeks ago, my usual separation-anxiety frenzy i'd go into weeks in advance that required fastitdious planning to eschew (see? without you, i rapidly disintegrate into the crazy lady who babbles & nods incoherently to herself, or to a can of peas) has seriously plummeted.  and i am actually missing not having corny jokes thrown at my head again and again.*  i've also not had more than 3 hours of sleep at a time for atleast a month.  so maybe there's some connection, but i can't say.  talk to me when i've had 4.

he's on a plane back to shanghai as i write this, and thus the apartment seems to reverberate with anticipation and the rooms seem warmer already.  it was odd how easily we had gotten used to being without the presence of the other.  i usually go into freak imagination mode and check my locks 8 times during the day -but was actually starting to get used to catching up for a few minutes with the super pixelated chuck close painting/max hedroom version of him.

we've never been party animals (except that one time on 6th street after we closed big bar with andrew and kevin and then crashed a house party and cal got cornered dancing with a lady thrice his size whlie i laughed my ass off) and our much more quiet life together since getting pregnant has truly become a touchstone for both of us at the end of the day. just feeling the other's nearness sometimes is enough.

kay. going to check my locks, put on a garlic necklace and then going to bed. 

*knock knock.  who's there?  baht.  baht who?  bahtman."
 

thoughts in alaska

Date: Tue, 24 Oct 2006 08:03:17 -0800 From:"grace wang" To:"angela wu" Subject: Re: Anchorage

Hi, Spencer:

You look like a little bear in the picture, I wish you could be here with grandma, you'd feel pretty at home in Anchorage because most of the native babies look just like you with chubby and rosy cheeks.  They are very friendly like you too, because they are well loved by their mommy and daddy like you, a lot of them have grandmommers who love them very much too. I miss you.  Alaska is beautiful, we are going to the seashore today to visit some of the fishing villages and see the many islands at the shore. It should be interesting.  I brought you a book on a baby bear and his mommy and daddy bear and some of his friends (deers, moose, whales, etc.) You are going to love it. I'll tell you all about Alaska when I see you, OK?

xoxoxoxoxo grandmommers

chinese is a loud language

when calvin's younger brother was little, and awoken in their house of 10 (no. i'm serious.) cantonese members by raucous chatter, he'd announce to his family, "chinese is a loud language!"

UGH!  i want to kill my neighbors right now.  the thing about babies is they don't know how to fall asleep on their own, so you've got to help them drift off.  tonight's routine included patting him to sleep with a pacifier for 20 minutes, silently congratulating myself as i watched my dinner being nuked, hearing him cry, returning to nurse him to sleep while simultaneously swallowing my dinner, and then patting him to sleep humming "you are my sunshine" for another 30 minutes.  kind of sweet, right?

let see, then about 10 minutes into his hard earned slumber the landlord, his wife, his daughter and her wedlock brat with the lung capacity of a cockatoo and shrill voice of a hyena (clearly genetic) start screaming what they had for dinner and slamming their doors because everyone should know their honey nut prawns were DAMN GOOD. if it's not that, the other neighbor has not only the craziest dinner parties at 1am, but also knows how to jingle all 700 of her keys when she comes home so it sounds like she's drunk and jingling 700 keys.  this is also part of the regular routine.

the thing is, this is shanghai.  it's not manhattan, brooklyn, and certainly not san francisco.  you can't ask your neighbors politely to be considerate of your baby and expect results.  this is a city that our friend katie had to rush her daughter to the er because the furniture was toxic, and no one was that surprised.  standards?  conscience?  hoho, no.  actually, after seeing katie's place and thinking her elevator to the apartment was super extravagent, i'm now convinced with kids, it's more a necessity than you think.  it's just so depressing that i feel i have to become more and more isolated, tai-tai-ish and paranoid to feel comfortable raising spencer here. i know those things probably would've happened anywhere after becoming a new parent, and there are trade offs, but come on.

god.  spencer thrashes about and protests loudly because he's a baby, and is barely 4 months old.  what's their excuse?

hermine

lovely hermine with spencer-oni. she came over to visit and brought him a halloween-themed onesie, which will come in real handy on the day of, seeing as the plush bear robe meesh and chrissy gave spencer would leave his baby barrel chest exposed.  [whistles]

i can't remember the last time i had a girlfriend come over and confabulate about relationship issues, politics, and family all in one afternoon!  i say confabulate because hermine's brain can indiscriminately recall the entire dictionary whether discussing profiteroles or mao atrocities.  and i feel smarter just thinking about her right now.

spencer was also lucky enough to experience hermine as a first babysitter.  she came over when studying for the lsats and calvin and i were able to have a date.  and as you can clearly see from the photo below, she makes a better sitter then me.  who is one giving the baby loving attention, while the other is anxiously calling verve to make sure they haven't sold that luscious christopher kon tote? in all her fuglitude, i might add?  i think i'm wearing a baby london school of economics shirt and olive legwarmers. i mean, thank god i'm already married.  spencer has wisely chosen to look the other way.

uncle david & auntie pauline

david and pauline came over for a visit before a svp meeting.  spencer trying to figure out whether to chomp david's hand or shake it, and being introduced to the new multi-functional development toy pauline picked out for the little guy, who is looking very mini bulldog.  they both seem pretty comfortable in these, er, potential roles, as i know well from my stay with them when cal was in london and i was their xiao ding-dong.

fabrizio moretti wuchin?

auntie katherine and uncle jamie sent him a lovely care package from katherine's clothing company! we love this drum kit t-shirt in rememberance of calvin's indie rock 'n roll days.

he's not only NAILED his disaffected band member look, but could also be holding a stick (or brewskie) with his left hand.   just pretend the doll is drew barrymore, and you've got a little fabrizio moretti wuchin.

home

here's some photos of our apartment complex in shanghai.  i really like it here because we have a lake where we can take spencer out in his hot wheels stroller.  cal & spence are giving much attitude by the faux rocks. and spence is demonstrating how the baby bjorn can be worn as a cowleck.

1 year ago

One year ago, Calvin's dad passed away in a tragic car accident.  So much has happened since that fateful night.  Many times I look at Spencer, and wish they could've met.  He's got Dad's smile.  I know if he were here, would've given the little knucklehead a famous huge bear snugg. And the little guy would've obliged with his little bear chubb.

Please take a second to look at the Shui Kuen Allen Chin Foundation website.  It's such a beautiful idea and represents the ideals that shaped his own life.  The foundation gives education scholarships to kids in need, and the first one is going out today. 

Here's looking at you, Knucks.

thank you, miwa & chris

we got a adorable halloween bib, striped hat and paul rand book today!  here's photos of spencer enjoying his gifts from the newlyweds in his pajamas .

that was fun, dad

spencer practicies standing in his stylin' owl shirt from uncle cliffy.